Writer - Peter Dabbene
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The Dao De Jing (The Way of the Tao) is the great classic of philosophical Daoism (Taoism). Traditionally attributed to the legendary Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu (Old Master), it was probably written during the era of Confucius. [The] opening passage illustrates two of the key ideas that characterize Daoist belief: it is impossible to define the nature of the universe, and inaction (not Confucian action) is the key to ordering the affairs of human beings." --World History: To 1500 by William J. Duiker and Jackson J. Spielvogel
* An explanatory note (in poetic verse): Dao De Jing, Daodejing, and Tao Te Ching are different names, but all the same thing Lao Tzu, Laozi, Lao Tseu and Lao Tse are all names of the Master, who developed "The Way" I Ching and Yijung, K'ung Fu-tse and Confucius, varied spellings keep it lively, though a bit circumlocutious What follows is a previously undiscovered dialogue among three Song-era prisoners, containing inaccuracies, anachronisms, and bad philosophy, translated from the original Chinese into English. A prison in Song-era China, circa 960 A.D. Three men sit inside a small, stone-walled prison cell. Prisoner #1 (reading aloud to himself): "Then the Old Master said—" Prisoner #2: (scrape scrape scrape scrape) Prisoner #1 (attempting to read aloud to himself): "Then the Old Master SAID—" Prisoner #2: (scrape scrape scrape scrape) Prisoner #1: One of the few benefits of the typical prison experience is an abundance of quiet and solitude. Our jailers have cruelly eliminated those benefits by placing you in this cell with me. At least our other cellmate restricts himself to an occasional "yes" or "no" comment. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: I apologize, but the noise is necessary. This is the latest wooden chopstick I have retained from our meal and surruptitiously used to slowly—and I mean slowly—dig between these stone blocks in the wall. Finally, progress is visible. We may be only several million strokes from removing a block and gaining our freedom! Prisoner #1: A fork or spoon would have served you better. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: Or a PAIR of chopsticks. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: Beggars can't be choosers. Prisoner #1: Nor can prisoners, I suppose. Prisoner #2: We have been trapped within these walls for almost a year, my friend. Can you not show the slightest joy at the possibility of escape? Prisoner #1: Our captors have graciously given us three books to study in prison: The I Ching, The Analects of Confucius, and the Tao Te Ching. I have spent most of my time studying the words of Laozi and the Tao Te Ching-- Prisoner #2: —while our cellmate and I have worn down chopstick after chopstick. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: Lousy Lao-Z! Think how much faster we might escape with your help. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: Lao Tzi taught that there are always unintended consequences. By attempting to change the world, we merely make it worse. Therefore, any attempt at escape is pointless. Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #2: Did Lao Tse, the Old Master, not also say, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step"? Prisoner #1: A thousand miles from here would put you in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. Prisoner #2: It applies to shorter distances also. Prisoner #1: The Old Master gave us many more appropriate truths. For example: “Give evil nothing to oppose and it will disappear by itself.” Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #2: I follow the model of Confucius, who advocated the "rectification of names" and advised "positive action". Prisoner #1: The rectification of names—you refer to his belief that we must know the proper names of things, or undertakings will fail and society will falter. Prisoner #2: Correct. Undertakings such as our planned escape via the scraping of the... whatchamacallit. Prisoner #1: Pardon? I'm not sure what you're referring to, and I believe I can feel society beginning to crumble. Prisoner #2: The scraping of the... stuff, you know! Between the stones in the wall! Prisoner #1: You mean the mortar? Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: But how does this help you? Even if we all agree to call the rock wall "the rock wall", the iron bars "the iron bars", the lock "the lock", and the jailer "the jailer", what does it achieve? Prisoner #2: His proper name is not "jailer". It is Wong. He is the one who first allowed me to keep a chopstick, and pointed out that the... MORTAR... between the stones might be vulnerable to digging. Prisoner #1: How did you get him to help you? Surely he could lose his job, or be killed! Prisoner #2: While you two were sleeping, I made it worth his while. Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #2: Yes. Prisoner #1: Are you saying that you—? Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: Yes. But only to help us escape. Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #1: You have degraded yourself pointlessly. The Daode Jing advises us to practice wu wei, which translates as "without action" or "without control". Prisoner #2: Why are you translating a Chinese word, when we are all Chinese? Prisoner #1: I merely feel a strange compulsion to do so. Please, indulge me. Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #2: But what about using the actions that are available to us? Wong's recommendation-- Prisoner #1: —was most likely presented to keep you occupied, but ultimately will prove futile. Prisoner #2: Sounds a lot like the study of philosophy. Prisoner #1: Quoth the Old Master: “Success is as dangerous as failure. Hope is as hollow as fear.” Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #2: No. Prisoner #1: "The Way is ever without action, yet nothing is left undone." "It is because The Way never attempts itself to become great that it succeeds in becoming great." Prisoner #2: All right, we'll try it your way, with no action. (several minutes pass in stillness) Prisoner #2: This is great. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: I'm being sarcastic. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: We are on the way. Prisoner #2: On the way to what? Prisoner #1: On the way to the path. I mean, on the path to The Way. Prisoner #2: We should follow the actions recommended by Wong, and heed the path before us. We must choose the Wong Wei. Prisoner #1: <snicker> You are unintentionally amusing. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: Would not the RIGHT way be preferable? <titter> Prisoner #2: The Wong Wei would wescue—I mean, rescue—us from our predicament! Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: Cheap laughter aside, the Wong Wei is the wrong way. It's my way or the highway. Prisoner #2: I choose the highway. Prisoner #1: Not actually an option. Prisoner #2: You oppose my every idea. Prisoner #1: There is a bright, sunny, masculine side, the Yang, and a darker, feminine side, called Yin, They oppose, and yet complete, each other. Prisoner #2: Are you saying "You complete me?" Prisoner #1: I'm saying your yang is in my yin. Prisoner #2: Don't you wish. Prisoner #1: Sometimes, I admit. Prisoner #2: We talk and talk, but achieve nothing. Prisoner #1: Now you're getting it. Prisoner #2: I mean that all this talking is a BAD thing. Prisoner #1: Hmm. You have a point. The Old Master did say, “The truth is not always beautiful, nor beautiful words the truth.” Prisoner #2: Our friend has found a passage in the Daodejing he wishes me to read. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: (Reading) The Old Master said, “He who knows, does not speak. He who speaks, does not know.”Prisoner #1: (silence) Prisoner #2: (silence) Prisoner #3: (silence) Prisoner #2: I-- Prisoner #1: Ha! You lose! Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: I was going to say that Confucius once observed, "Silence is the true friend that never betrays." Prisoner #1: It is well known that many quotations attributed to Confucius are apocryphal at best. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: I am tired of this. We are old men, and I have no wish to live the remainder of my life in prison with you two. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: Let us at least try to do something to improve our fortunes! Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: Still you do not understand. The Old Master said, “The flame that burns twice as bright burns half as long.” Prisoner #2: Is this a math question? Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: It is not a math question. The true Taoist generally lives a longer life, by avoiding the stresses of needless effort. Prisoner #2: So, a longer life in prison. Sounds appealing. Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #2: I'm not impressed. Anyone could come up with these stupid "deep" aphorisms. Prisoner #1: Oh, can they? I ask you to prove it. Prisoner #2: OK, here goes. Ummm... "The water runs until it does not." Prisoner #3: <snicker> Prisoner #1: Hmm... Obvious. True. And yet mysterious. Prisoner #2: "The sky is blue; there is no point in wishing it was green." Prisoner #3: <hee hee> Prisoner #1: This too, is like a koan, inside a riddle, wrapped in an enigma. And yet somehow, not. Prisoner #2: "One man's diarrhea is another man's liquid fertilizer." Prisoner #3: <snort, laughter> Prisoner #1: It seems you are wiser than you first appear. I shall record these sayings, and compile them into a book. I will call it Tao Te Ching: The Sequel. Prisoner #2: If nothing can dissuade you from your reliance on these texts, then at least consult a different, more practical one. If not the The Analects of Confucius, then perhaps the I Ching? Prisoner #1: How do you propose to use it? If we had three coins, we could divine our futures, but our money has been taken away. Prisoner #2: Voila! Prisoner #1: Three... how did you get those coins? Prisoner #2: A token of appreciation, from Wong. Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #2: Yes. Prisoner #1: Very well, then. Toss the coins and let us see what fortune holds for us. Prisoner #2: Wait—rather than divine our futures, should we not create our futures, by using the hard metal coins to scrape the mortar more effectively? Prisoner #1: Now you are being ridiculous. Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #1: I ask you, I Ching, how should we proceed? (Tosses coins six times, consults I Ching) Prisoner #1: Hmm... Hexagram 29, "Repeating Chasms". Deep, dark, depressing... this seems to be accurate. When we three are together, we invariably fall into misfortune of one sort or another. Prisoner #2: Toss them again. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: I... very well. (Tosses coins six times, consults I Ching) Prisoner #1: Hexagram 40, "Liberation and Release"! There are "changing lines", however, so I must cast the coins again, to get the second part of the divination. (Tosses coins six times, consults I Ching) Prisoner #2: What did it change to? Prisoner #1: Hexagram 47. "Confinement". Prisoner #2: Do it again. Prisoner #1: The I Ching's results are meant to be reflected upon at length. Do you think we can just keep redoing the divination until we get the results we want? Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: Okay, but this is the last time. (Tosses coins six times, consults I Ching) Prisoner #1: Hexagram 12, "Stagnation or Impasse". Prisoner #2: This sucks. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: The I Ching has spoken. We should wait and allow what is to be, to be. Prisoner #2: (Consulting book) Wouldn't that be Hexagram 5, "Waiting"? Prisoner #1: If you were not ready to consult the Yijing, you should not have done so. Prisoner #2: But the Emperor has imprisoned us wrongly! We cannot simply sit here and accept it! Remember what Confucius's follower Mencius taught us? If a ruler is not meeting his responsibilities, the people are justfied in acting against him. This is the Mandate of Heaven! The Mandate of Heaven must bring satisfaction to both sides! Prisoner #1: Hmm... yes. Without mutual satisfaction, it would be... the Man-Date of Hell? Prisoner #3: <chortle> Prisoner #2: Perhaps you are over-interpreting the meaning of "inaction". Prisoner #1: And perhaps it is you who are mistaken. Prisoner #2: Or maybe both of us. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: Friend, where do you stand on all of this? Do you also subscribe to the notions of Lao Tseu? Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #2: Ah. Confucius, then? Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #1: Well then, what DO you believe in? Prisoner #3: (Bows, whirls, stabs, kicks, spins, punches, kicks, bows) Prisoner #2: I believe he is indicating the martial arts, or, more specifically, Shaolin Kung Fu. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: He puts the "Kung Fu" in K'ung Fu-tse. Prisoner #1: You studied at the Shaolin Buddhist Monastery? Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: Are you kidding? Why didn't you whip out those moves when we were being taken prisoner? Did you forget you knew this stuff? Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #2: You just chose the "path of inaction"? Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: But you said you didn't believe in—oh. It's because the soldiers had swords, isn't it? Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: Maybe we can get Wong to open the door, and you can do your thing. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: How will you get him to open the door? Prisoner #2: I'll do my thing. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: It could work! We could escape! Prisoner #1: Here comes the guard. Prisoner #2: Hi Wo—wait, you're not Wong. What happened to Wong? Prisoner #1: It seems he has been replaced. It may be that your illicit liasions were discovered. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #1: Perhaps I should write my own book of quotable wisdom, based on our prison experiences, so that others do not repeat the same mistakes. Prisoner #2: Confucius say, "Man who attempts to write in jail cell will have rough prison sentence." Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: You are faced with a choice, my friend. You can adhere to The Way, and remain locked in this small cell with us until death, or you can risk meaningless action and at least enjoy the hope of freedom for a time. Prisoner #1: Point taken. What do you suggest? Prisoner #2: As Confucius famously said, "When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don't adjust the goals, adjust the action steps." Prisoner #1: Again, that is a mistaken attribution. Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: Hmm.My intent was to inspire us to consider our situation and adjust to it, while keeping our end goal of escape in mind. Perhaps another Confucius quote, accurately attributed, would do so? Prisoner #3: Yes. Prisoner #2: "If life gives you lemons, make lemonade." Prisoner #3: No. Prisoner #2: Sigh. Very well. It is not so inspirational, but as wise men have surely said before: "Let us start digging." Prisoner #1: I hate philosophy. THE END |
